Another person came to me recently because she is struggling with her Catholic faith. I know so many people who were "Born and Raised" Catholics, but then either fall out of faith completely, or more often, look to a different church to fulfil their needs.
My friend came to me over the weekend and wanted to talk about religion. I know that's usually a topic better left unsaid, along with politics, but I like to think I keep being sought out because I'm open about my strong faith, but reasonable enough to listen to the issue at hand, without preaching. Whatever the reason, I'm happy. I love discussing religion and trying to help out a friend in crisis.
Here's the situation, it's an all to common one. "Jane" was born into a Catholic home. She was brought up in the faith and completed all the rites expected of her. She met a boy who wasn't Catholic but he went through RCIA, so now Jane could get married in her Church and continue being a good Catholic. Jane had two kids, both were baptized Catholic.
She occasionally went to church with her family, but found it difficult. The kids were bored, the church was so large that the little one would get scared and scream. Jane couldn't make it through a Mass without having to get up and move to the back of the building. Thus, she wasn't getting much out of the experience either. Jane didn't know anyone at Church, so no one really missed her when she didn't attend.
A couple of years pass, and Jane still isn't going to Church. She misses it, misses her relationship with God, but can't bring herself to repeat the experience of attending Mass she had before. Then, Jane speaks with one of her friends of a different faith. She is invited to go to Sunday Mass at the friend's church. Jane packs up the family, and off they go. It's a whole new experience. As soon as she walks in, she feels welcomed, like an old friend who stopped by to visit. Mass is similar to the Catholic one, but there are a few differences. After Mass, there is Fellowship Hour. People gather for coffee and socializing. Jane speaks to more people in that one hour than she did in the years she attended the other church.
Here's the dilema. Jane has always categorized herself as Catholic. She believes it's part of her identity. Jane came to me because of her fears. She's afraid she won't be able to categorize herself as Catholic if she becomes a part of the new church, she's also afraid of being shunned by Catholics for turning her back on the faith that raised her. I completely understand these fears. I have them myself. I explained to her the main difference between Catholic faith and every other christian faith. Even though the two churches are very similar, there are some key differences. I encouraged her to speak with the Priest and find out from him the specific differences between the new church and her previous one. Only she can determine if not being Catholic is important enough to her to stay at a place she's not satisfied. I tried to help her realize she wouldn't be "shunned" by Catholics for changing faith. She doesn't have any relations that are strong enough in their belief to do so. (I however do, thus, my major hinderance in searching for a more fulfilling religious experience).
I pray she finds what she's looking for. I pray for her everyday that she will find God in her own way. Maybe this is the path she needs. She invited me to come along to the new church one Sunday so I can see the differences myself. I'm thinking about going, but I would have to go without M, which is causing a new set of problems for me.
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